I need to contact the Olympic Committee. While walking my dogs I came up with an exciting new sport for dog owners that I think they should consider. It is a timed, competitive sport and the play goes like this: The contestant, with two unruly dogs on extensible leashes, stands on a sidewalk facing a small hill with a line of bushes at the top. The blow of a whistle starts the clock and one of the dogs runs up the hill and retrieves a two-week-dead, roadkill rabbit that has been placed in the bushes. Using only his feet and tugs on the leashes the contestant must first get the dog to drop the rabbit, and then kick the rabbit back up the hill and into the bushes without letting either dog get to it. Each contestant gets three attempts and the best time decides the winner. The contestant is allowed to kick the dog but only while it is holding the rabbit. Once the rabbit has been dropped a three-tenths of a second penalty applies for each dog kicked.
For the contestant the sport requires agility, speed, strategy, a great deal of upper body strength and a strong stomach; and for the dog: speed, agility and sturdy ribs. It is a bit of a rough-and-tumble sport, but the dogs (who get the worst of it in that regard) enjoy it immensely.